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How to successfully co-parent with your ex-spouse

No matter where you are in the divorce process, you may find yourself wondering how you can co-parent with your ex-partner in St. Charles County when there is so much animosity and arguing. You may not want anything to do with your spouse now that you are moving on. But if you want to minimize the amount of stress and conflict your children will endure because of the situation, you should learn how to tolerate your soon-to-be ex-spouse. 

A divorce decree does not change the fact that your kids have two parents. You do not need to live together or agree about everything to raise them successfully. You just need to develop a good co-parenting plan and stick with it. 

Change your perspective 

With everything that you are going through in your divorce, you may find it hard to see your situation clearly. Your needs become secondary to your kids' needs when it comes to parenting. Your children need parents who are going to fight for them and put their best interests first, and it can be hard for you to see or know what they need if you cannot see things from their perspective. Try to put yourself in their shoes periodically so you can get a better understanding of how they perceive their new lives, you and their other parent. Use that information to improve your parenting skills and co-parenting efforts with their other parent. 

Let it go 

Sometimes you may not agree with your ex-partner’s actions or words. You may not even agree with the way he or she is parenting your kids, but that does not mean you should try to control everything he or she does or says. As much as you may want to control things, you need to accept your situation and let go of control. Focus your efforts on controlling yourself to improve your parenting behavior so that it motivates your former partner to do the same.

Co-parenting is not always an easy job, but with careful planning and consideration from both parents, it can work. If you and your ex-spouse are having a hard time creating or honoring your parenting agreement or child custody order, you should speak to an attorney to learn about your options.

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